Kill Your Inner Loser / Andy Wells

My Magnum Opus is Now $1 [How I Built a Winners Mindset]

November 03, 2023 Andy Wells
Kill Your Inner Loser / Andy Wells
My Magnum Opus is Now $1 [How I Built a Winners Mindset]
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Everything I've learned over the last 10 years, put into a video course.
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Speaker 1:

Hello, ladies and gentlemen, let's talk a little bit about my video course. So I'm releasing this for pay whatever you want, which means you can even pay $1 if you want. So I have poured everything I have into this video course, as I mentioned in the last video, and let's just go through it and have a little bit of a look Again. Like I said, you can just pay $1 for this course. No catch, no bullshit. Literally, you can just pay $1. This is the payment page for the video course, which I'll leave a link in the description below and maybe in the comments as well. So you can just come in here and enter whatever the hell you want as a price. You can enter $1,. You can enter $9 billion if you want that. So pay whatever you want. I'm moving towards this model where I'm gonna. I am doing this model for all of my video courses and books going forward. So I've made my how to have threesome's guide $1. Cam has also written a book on how to have sex in six weeks If you're a virgin or inexperienced, and we're gonna make this one $1. When I say $1, you can pay whatever you want for it, but minimum $1. So I like this model more. I didn't come up with this idea of just making everything pay whatever you want. One of my coaches my spiritual coach, keith his grandfather does like life coaching and spiritual healing and stuff like that and he basically has a model where it's like pay me whatever you can afford, I don't care what that is, and I will help you. So I really like that model. We're gonna stick with that model. So, yeah, let's go through the video course. So here are all the chapters that are in it and I think I might release a couple more chapters for free on YouTube as well. I mean, I say for free. The video course is $1 if that's all you have to pay anyway, but I'll release a couple more chapters on YouTube. So, because I think some of them are really helpful, especially probably these two overcoming fear, limiting beliefs and self doubt and failures, set back in stress, how to become resilient those are probably the two I don't know, I don't know what's gonna be most helpful to people, but those are the two longest chapters and the ones that I felt like are gonna impact the most people. So the different chapters that I have, I guess we can kind of do a little run through of each one. So growth mindset versus fixed mindset. Basically, the concept in this one is a lot of people have this idea that they're stuck where they are and they very much feel like you know, I am short so I can't get laid, or I'm this so I can't do that. I'm not attractive so the opposite sex wouldn't like me. I'm stuck in this dead end job that I don't like and I can't break out of it. You know, it's just the way that it is, or this is the way that I am. You hear this a lot when people self-diagnose or they make things binary. So how many times of, and maybe some of you have said the same thing? How many times have you heard someone say you know, I'm an introvert, it's such a fixed mindset, it's such a fixed way of looking at yourself or the world. And so in this first chapter I talk about how to sort of break out of that and realize that everything is, or every personality trait or everything about you is sort of like a, like a stat in an RPG game. You know, it's a quality or something that you can improve with practice, and there is nothing in life that can't be improved with practice, like when it comes to ourselves. So this first chapter talks about that. The second chapter is play to win instead of playing not to lose. I feel like this is a big one. There are a lot of people. There's a lot of subtlety in this one. So when I say, play to win, what I? Another way of thinking about that is focus on the things that you want rather than the things you don't want. And so when I say playing not to lose, it's like you're trying to avoid a loss. Or maybe here's an example that might resonate with a lot of you it's like you're trying to avoid rejection or failure. I've had so many people you know guys in particular, but women too. Guys will come to me and say you know, I'm so scared of hitting on women because I'm really worried that they will reject me. Focusing on not getting rejected or worrying about rejection is playing not to lose. You're going God, I hope I don't lose. I hope I don't lose. But instead it's infinitely more productive to focus on winning. So, rather than saying I don't want to get rejected or I'm scared of getting rejected, you say why do I even care? If I'm going to get rid of? What does that have to do with anything. That's just part of what might happen in order for me to get to my goal, and so I'm going to focus on the goal. I'm going to play to win. I'm going to focus on having a great time with the women that I talked to and hit on. I'm going to focus on getting some phone numbers. If I don't get any phone numbers, hey, I'll play to win. I'll focus on improving myself. So I feel like this is quite an important mindset chapter play to win rather than playing not to lose. And it does seem like just a subtle thing at the start, but it's really life changing if you can embrace this idea of always focusing on what you want rather than what you don't want. Next chapter is every problem has a solution. This is another really big mindset change, Like if you can shift and start to believe that, hey, maybe there's a potential for every problem that I have to have some sort of solution, like, maybe, just maybe, I can figure this out or I can make it work, oh my God, the entire universe opens up for you, because you don't get stuck in hopelessness anymore. You're not sitting there in that sort of like fixed mindset, thinking man, like I'm never going to solve this problem. You know, I see in comments and I just see random people as they go about their life they will have a problem and they'll just assume that it's insurmountable, that nothing can be done, and they'll be correct. You know, I even talk about this in here. That's called a self-fulfilling prophecy. You know, hopeless is a mindset. If we say something is hopeless and there's no solutions, then we won't try as hard to find a solution. Because why the hell would you try and find a solution to something you think can't be solved? That would be idiotic. And then we'll give up and guess what? We'll have been right that nothing could be done. So this is called a self-fulfilling prophecy. But if you can really drill it into your head that you know every problem has a solution, and if you repeat that to yourself like a mantra, then you will try harder, you will refuse to quit, you will ask other people for solutions, you will ask for help, you will go and do research, you will try. You won't be afraid of failure because you're playing to win. You don't really care how many times you fail, you're just there to win. And then you'll eventually figure out a solution. And then it turns out, you would have been right that something could be done. Again, this is a self-fulfilling prophecy. So hopeless is a mindset, like if you believe that something can't be done, you're correct. Like I won't even argue with you and say that you're wrong. And sometimes I do have people in the comment section and I might get an email from time to time and someone will say you know, I'm short and there's no way I can do this, or I'm too old, there's no way I can start a business now. And they're just so utterly convinced of that. I don't try and take that away from them. I'm like, hey, if you don't want me to convince you, I usually say to them what would you like from me? Like, would you like me to help? You believe that this is possible. Like, what do you actually want? But the people that say you know I don't want anything from you. I'm convinced, I already know that it's hopeless. I don't try and take that away from them. Why would I? That's their story. They can tell whatever story that they want. And I've tried for so many years to take that story away from people and convince them that it's not hopeless, and I've never succeeded. I've succeeded when they want me to help them, which is why I now initiate all of those conversations by saying what would you like from me? That's how I start every single one of those. That's my instant reply what would you like from me? Oh, how can I help? But what would you like from me is a much. I like that better. And if they say you know, I essentially want to hang on to my hopelessness hey, I'm not going to take that away from you. I can't take that away from you. I have tried for so many years and I can't take that story away from people. So if you believe that it can't, nothing can be done, you're correct. If you believe that something can be done, you're correct. And so in the rest of this chapter I go through like all of the different mindsets of how to figure out solutions, and you know how I actually find solutions. You know I step back, I ask other people, I give myself permission to suck. So there's a lot there on, like how to actually find those solutions In the next chapter. Oh, I like this chapter too. This is a really big mindset shift If you can believe that everything that happens in your life or everything that happens to you is actually good, or even just potentially good, like maybe, just maybe there might be a silver lining in this event or this thing that's happening. Holy shit, the world opens up like everything starts to become a fun game. You don't suffer nearly as much. Eventually you can get to a point where you don't suffer at all and it starts to feel like the entire world is your friend and eventually you start to realize that everything in your life is a gift, even the stuff that seems like suffering, even the stuff that you're very tempted to say this is awful, I lost my job, this is so bad. One exercise that I do with lots of my clients is I will, whenever something like that happens and they're tempted to say this sucks, or they say, you know, this sucks, I lost my job, this is so awful. What I will get them to do is I'll say, okay, right, a list of five reasons why this could be a good thing, five reasons you're grateful that you lost your job. Or, if you're not at that point yet, well, you can't do that. Okay, five ways this could potentially be a good thing, five ways there could maybe be some sort of silver lining here if we look really hard for it and we get really creative. And doing this exercise helps you feel more empowered. It helps you feel more like okay, fuck man, maybe this isn't a bad thing. I'm not going to sit around and cry about this. I'm not going to and nothing wrong with crying. But, like I'm not going to sit around and feel sorry for myself, I'm not going to sit around and suffer. I'm going to start looking for solutions. Or I'm going to embrace this thing or I'm going to find some silver lining in it, or I'm going to make some silver lining in it. You know, if this thing that's happened, like I've lost my job, I am going to try so goddam hard and put all of my heart and soul into fixing up my resume, making it amazing. I'm going to go and apply for a job. I'm going to find a job that's better than the one that I just lost. I am going to make this a good thing. I refuse to lose. I refuse to let this be a bad thing. I refuse to let myself be a victim. I'm going to find some way that I can win here. I'm not going to play, not to lose. I'm not going to cry about the fact that I just lost Again. If you cry, that's fine, but I'm not going to feel sorry for myself for losing. I'm not even going to see it as a loss. I'm going to see this as the start of the next chapter. So this chapter is like a massive, massive, massive mindset shift. I even play a video by Jocko Willink in the video course version. By the way, what you're seeing on screen is the ebook version, so if you buy the course, it comes with both. So, like, here's the video course. Yeah, this clip here it's by Jocko Willink and it's just called Good. You can find it on YouTube if you just search for Jocko Willink, good. And in this I won't play it out for you. But in this video he basically talks about the same mindset that I have, where he's like everything that happens in my he doesn't say everything that happens in my life, but he says anytime something bad comes up, I just say good, you know, he's classic, like deep, masculine Jocko Willink, navy Seal voice. He's like good, you know, this bad thing happened. Good, let's fucking take some action, let's get to work. And so I have the same mindset. It's like everything that happens in my life is potentially a beautiful thing, if I'm willing to look for it. Grant Cardone, entrepreneur, businessman, has a really great quote I love as well Every problem is an opportunity in disguise. Byron Katie has a similar one where she says nothing in life happens to me. It's all happening for me, as in, everything is a gift. So there's all these different ways of saying the same thing. One thing that I used to say was this is a chance to practice my stoicism. Like if something like you know, someone would yell at me or I'd get some negative comment or something on YouTube or something that used to bother me a lot these things don't bother me at all anymore, but when they used to bother me a lot, I would say, okay, this is a chance for me to practice my stoicism and my resilience. Cam used to joke about that. My friend, you know, fellow coach Cam used to joke about that a lot. He'd be like, oh, I bet you Andy's going to say this is a chance to practice his stoicism and I'd be like, yeah, man, it is like, let's go, baby, let's build that resilience, let's build that armor, let's build that. You know, being okay mindset. So yeah, all of these different ways to say the same thing, that everything in your life can be good and I give a couple of examples in this chapter of you know my partner broke up with me. Here's five reasons that can be good. I'm insecure and that's bad. Here's five reasons insecurity can actually be your best friend. So lots of examples. I give you a few books as well and a few, you know, like philosophers and stuff like that, that you can read and really dive into this. But really it's just practice. It's like doing these exercises and everything in this video course is practice. You could watch this entire video course and if you don't apply it, nothing like you'll feel slightly better for a month or two and then you'll go back to your default, normal programming or behavior. So I give you a lot of exercises in this video course and if you're going to do it, then actually do it. But it's really just a practice of like this exercise. You know, anytime something happens in your life, come up with three reasons, four reasons, five reasons why this is a good thing, and I just did this for like a year or two and then at some point I mean longer than a year or two, like a couple of years, and at some point not at some point, but it was a slow transition of starting to feel more and more positive until now. I'm at the point where you could give me anything Imaging could die tomorrow and I'd be like, okay, this is probably a beautiful thing. I just don't know why yet. But I'm going to trust and just see what happens now. Like I could be in hospital, crippled, paraplegic tomorrow and I'd be like this is a beautiful thing. I just don't know why yet, but I'll sit here and write five reasons why. Hey, it's a great chance for me to sit there and really practice and fall in love with myself, because now I'm going to be spending a lot more time with myself because I can't fucking walk. Hey, it's a beautiful time, a beautiful chance to reflect back on the time when I could walk. I'm grateful for all of the memories, isn't that beautiful? I can look at other people who are walking and I can just feel so much love and happiness for them Because they get to go about their life and walk Isn't that beautiful? I can have a lot more chance or a lot more time to think and I can do more video courses and books and things like that, and I'll have to dictate them verbally. But hey, man, what a beautiful opportunity. I'm sitting or laying on a fucking bed or in a wheelchair Now. I've got way more time to do that. I can help more people. I could probably help more people if I can't fucking walk, because what else am I going to fucking do with my time? Probably can't have sex. So like I'll save a whole bunch of time there, I'm not going to go for long walks outside. I can save a whole bunch of time there. So you can pretty much anything. You can come up with like three reasons, five reasons why it could potentially be a good thing or why it could be. If you can't get to the point of it being a good thing, you can at least say why it's not necessarily a bad thing. You could say maybe this is just neutral, maybe this just is what it is. Can I come up with a couple of reasons for that? So doing this exercise and practicing a lot has really, like been such a game changer for me. Again, if you're going to grab this video course or the book and again you can just pay $1 for it if you want to If you're going to get it, I really would recommend that you take action on it. All the books that I've read in my life. You know loving what is letting go. I need your love, is that true? You can't afford the luxury of a negative thought. All of the books that I talk about, they don't do anything unless you take some sort of action with them. So put this stuff into practice, don't just read or watch it. Next chapter is on setting goals, and in this one look at that beautiful little Mario. That was like my first video game that I ever played Super Mario World for the Super Nintendo. So in this chapter I talk about, like, how I set goals, like what I do. Beforehand. I ask myself the question what do I want? And then I, you know, think about what I want. I reverse engineer it, I make sure it's achievable. I set a deadline, although I don't always set a deadline. I talk about that later in this chapter. There's sort of two ways to go about goals. You can either set a deadline and like a target that you're working towards and then take action towards that, or you can set like daily habits or like weekly habits, like just focus on the action you're gonna take and then trust that you will eventually get wherever you wanna go. So both of those work and I talk about like which one to pick and really the shortcut or the short version is pick whichever one you want, like you don't have to pick one or the other, like it doesn't really matter. But then I talk about my process. I break goals down into smaller goals Like this is why I talk about all the time baby steps. I take some action right that second, like something. So in my coaching program lots of times people will come to me with some or come to us with some sort of goal, like maybe their goal is I wanna start a business. I'm sitting down with a guy today doing one of the you know $200 coaching course and he wants to start a business and what I'm gonna tell him is go outside and make $10 today. And he's probably gonna say I don't know how to do that. Go up to fucking 50 people and say can I please have $1? And 10 of them will say here you go, here's a dollar. Some of them will just give you $5 immediately or $10. If anyone ever asked me for money, I give them fucking 20 or $50. So it's like you can make $10 immediately. So that's usually my baby step that I get people to do If they wanna start a business. I'm like go make some money right now. $10 outside. Go Right now, you have two hours. Go and they come back and they go. Holy shit, I made some money. What the fuck Like I can just ask for money. Yes, homeless people have been doing it since the dawn of time. So I usually like to make people or get people to take some sort of action, right that. Second, if your goal was, I wanna talk to women, I wanna hit on women, I would say go outside right now and just try and smile at one or two women. If you're feeling really confident, say hi, how's your day going to one woman and then you can just leave. But just take one little baby step. If you wanted to lose weight, I would say, okay, go on Google right now and spend five minutes googling the gyms in your area. That's all you have to do. Take that one little tiny baby step Now you can say I've started, I started researching gyms and then the next day do one more little baby step. Maybe you narrow it down to the two best gyms that you think look really good, based on Google reviews or photos or whatever. Then day three Okay, fuck it, I'll drive to one of the gyms and I'll just sit in the car park. I don't even have to go inside. If that's too scary for me, I'll just sit in the car park and I can go inside if I'm feeling brave. Or I can sit in the car park. Day four okay, fuck it, I'll go to that gym and I'll just walk in. I'll stand in the waiting room, I'll just look around and then I'll leave. Day five I'll go in and I'll ask the staff if I can just look around a little bit. So, baby steps and taking action. Most people don't achieve goals because they make it too big and scary. You know, they say I have to fix my sex life. It's like good luck. That's really fucking scary. Why would you even be able to do that? Or I have to lose like 50 pounds. Yeah, good luck with that. That sounds fucking incredibly difficult. Even someone like David Goggins has used this mini steps sort of approach. If you listen to how he talks about how he lost all the weight, because he used to be very obese, he said he was really intimidated by all the weight that he needed to lose. So he asked himself can I lose one pound, and he thought, okay, I can lose one pound, and he just did that. And then he just repeated that and then he turned himself into the badass that we all know and love. So I talk about, yeah, the concept of time to action, which is basically the quicker you can start taking some sort of action towards a new goal, like, from the moment you have a goal of, like okay, I really just I think I want to lose weight the quicker you can take one tiny little baby step, the more likely you are to achieve that goal. And don't stress yourself if you've been procrastinating a goal for years or something, it doesn't mean you're gonna be a failure. But like if right now, as you're listening to this video, if you have a goal or something that you've been thinking you want for quite a long time that you've been procrastinating, what if, right now, you hit pause on this video and you take one tiny little baby step, even if it's just, I will look up some gyms in my area or I will go outside for a walk and just look at people of the opposite sex, or if you're into the same sex, do that too, but I will just take one tiny little bit of action In this chapter. I also talk about accountability, how to measure your progress, like how to see if you're actually making progress, what to do if you feel overwhelmed and I have an entire chapter on what to do if you feel overwhelmed, but there's a little bit in here as well. You know what to do if you feel like you're terrified of your goals and you don't think they're possible. I haven't again, I have an entire chapter on limiting beliefs and thinking that you can't achieve a goal. I talk about patience, gratitude but there's a whole chapter on gratitude as well. Yeah, talk about the different types of goals, where you can set a goal in a deadline or you can just focus on the daily habits and trusting that you'll get there. And then I talk about the three things that really just matter for any goal, which is like give yourself permission to suck at the start, or, in other words, be humble. You could also phrase that as be humble, like don't expect perfection from the beginning. Focus on taking baby steps each day, like just do a little bit each day. If you can't do it every day, that's fine, but like just take some baby steps towards your goal as often as you can and then don't quit. That's it. That's like literally the secret to everything I've ever achieved and everything anyone else has ever achieved. By the way, this is the formula that they've taken. It's like don't expect perfection at the start, take some action, keep going. That's it. Then, in the next chapter, yeah, overcoming fear, limiting beliefs and self-doubt. So in this one, I talk about, like we have fear, limiting beliefs and self-doubt, but basically, like when you've set a goal and you're thinking like, fuck, I can't do this, like I don't know if this is possible, or maybe you're halfway towards a goal and you're really doubting yourself, you know those insecurities are starting to creep in. I talk this entire chapter. I think this is the longest chapter. I think it's like 30 pages or something and the video version is you know, again, the video version is like included with this. The video version goes into this in even more detail, but like, yeah, I just talk about like everything to do, everything that I do when I'm feeling all these feelings, and that it's okay to feel these feelings. There's nothing wrong with you. Like, pretty much everybody gets scared when they have new goals. That's why most people don't achieve goals or big goals, because it can be scary, and in the video course version I have a whole bunch of like meditations and shit like that. I've put like a lot more stuff into the video course. So if you do end up grabbing this which again it's literally $1. If that's all you can afford, pay whatever you want, but you can pay as little as $1. If you do grab it which I highly recommend, the video I would watch the video course version. You can read this book version as well, but, like, I would definitely watch the video course version because I added more stuff in there. There's lots of stuff on the screen and videos and extra shit. So, yeah, the first thing I always do when I'm feeling these feelings of fear, limiting beliefs, doubt, insecurity, worry that I'm not gonna make it, hopelessness even, which I don't really feel anymore at all. I don't actually it's funny, I don't feel a lot of these feelings anymore, or I do, but I just don't care anymore. But I talk about that a little further in the chapter. Anyway, when I am feeling, or was feeling these feelings, what I would do is I would give myself permission to suck and I'd say you know, like I don't have to be perfect at this. What's the worst that happens if I fail and there is no failure, there's no mistakes. I talk about that more in this video course as well. But, like what's the worst that happens, I learned something like that's not bad. So I talk about how to run towards fear. I talk about how to, you know, let other people reassure us during these stresses and these fears and all of this. You know how to question your fears to see if you're just sort of overreacting. Like literally, what to do with fears, how to do the work. Yeah, this video, which is in the video course as well, like this video has helped me. It's sort of like a guided meditation almost what to do if you have any setbacks or any stress that's a separate chapter in this as well. What to do if you're feeling overwhelmed. The power of faith and letting go. A lot of you have asked me to do a video on faith because I've said faith has helped me a lot, and when I say faith, I don't mean necessarily like religious faith. It's more like having faith that it will all work out, or having faith in some sort of like higher power and I talk about that here, like for some of you that might mean God. Like I'm going to have faith in God. God will look after me. Some of you, the universe might work for you. Like I'm going to trust that the universe will look after me. That resonates with me, although the word God resonates with me too. I'm not religious, but the word God resonates with me. If that doesn't resonate with you, you can use the phrase the self-improvement gods. You're like I'm going to trust in the self-improvement gods. I also trust in the people that are further ahead of me. That could be me. Like it could be someone else that you listen to. It could be your parents, it could be whoever. But there's been lots of times I just have blind faith in the people who are giving me advice and I just say like all right, I'm just going to trust this person. They've done it. Maybe I can too. You know the motto of my website is you sure as hell can too? It's in the banner image on the top of my YouTube channel. It's on my homepage, on my blog. I say it sometimes If I can do this shit, you sure as hell can too. So you can just sort of trust in that statement. If someone else has done it, maybe I can too, and it does require humility and blind faith. You have to literally say I don't know if this is going to work out, especially when you're having those doubts and those fears and that voice inside you is saying I can't do this. How many times do you sort of see, or do I sort of see, somebody who thinks they're an expert in their own life? They think they're an expert with their limiting beliefs? They're like I'm short, therefore no woman would ever like me. It's like oh, you're just an expert on that, are you? What about all of the short men in the entire fucking planet who have sex? Do they just not count? Do they? Is your opinion? Is your expertise, suppose that expertise more correct than all of the evidence in front of you? And so this sort of step can require a lot of humility and blind faith. You have to have to say the voice inside my head is screaming at me that I can't make it, that it's not possible, that I can't do this thing. Man, maybe I don't know, maybe I don't know if it's possible. You know, I even say that there, like if I'm the newbie, if I haven't achieved this goal, how the hell do I know what's possible? Like, literally, I'm the dumb newbie. And so there have been times where I've said to myself I'm just a dumb newbie. There's been times that Ed so Ed's one of the coaches in our coaching program Ed has said that statement to people and he's polite about it. He doesn't call them like a dumb newbie, but he just says, like you're a newbie, like what are you Fucking? No, you don't know anything. Like trust Andy, trust me, trust Cam. Like you don't know anything, you're the newbie. You came to us for advice. How the hell do you know that something is impossible or that it's going to go badly or whatever? So a lot of this does require letting go. It's humility, it's blind faith sometimes and I give you a couple of promises. You know, like I promise you'll make it. Like this whole video courses me basically saying like look, you got this, you'll be okay, I promise. I want to make sure that I can get into what I'm trying to get in my content in general. I'm trying to get across to you like everything's okay, you're going to make it. I promise you do want a great job, keep it up. That's me trying to give you that blind faith and I fully acknowledge it is blind faith. At times you are just literally blindly believing in me, like I did with the people that you know, like good looking loser was one of them. Chris, from good looking loser, I just had complete and utter blind faith in him and I had everything in my head was like this isn't possible. He was super attractive, he had lots of muscle. He was younger than me when he started this shit. I was, you know, 29 or 28 when I first started almost 29. I felt like I was too old. I felt like I had well, I did have zero friends. I had no muscle, I wasn't cool, I didn't have any money. I just wasn't super attractive. I was like fucking hell. I am really trusting you on blind faith, chris. I'm trusting that this will work out and it did because I had faith. So, yeah, faith is such a powerful tool in self-improvement. I don't think it gets talked about at least, okay, I haven't talked about it as much as I would like to. A really good book on this is Letting Go by David Hawkins. This is like the book on faith and letting go and just trusting. So it's called Letting Go the pathway of surrender. It's by David Hawkins. Look at that beautiful yellow cover. I love this book. I love all of his books. By the way, power versus force is amazing. The map of consciousness explained is amazing. I have an entire chapter on the map of consciousness in this video course. So I really like David Hawkins. So Letting Go is that book yeah, and I let go on an even deeper level and I just trust that everything in the entire universe will be okay. I sometimes have just in the past said everything's okay, everything is going to be okay, and I just repeat that to myself over and over again until it becomes like just something that you blindly trust and believe. And then, as a self-fulfilling prophecies, go, it turns out to be true. That's a basic psychological trick. If you tell yourself something enough times, you make it come true. What we David Hawkins has a quote what we hold in mind, tends to manifest. So if you walk around all the time saying life is unfair, life is cold, life sucks, human beings are evil, everything is painful, life is suffering, then you'll make it come true. And if you walk around going everything's okay, everything's going to be okay, I'm going to work out, I'll always find a solution, things will go well. You know, I'm always supported and loved, the universe will look after me. If you just say these things to yourself literally millions of times, you start making them come true, you start to brainwash yourself in a positive way, you start to believe that maybe it could become true. Then you try a little harder, you take a little more action, you start putting yourself out there more, you start improving and then guess what? It becomes true. So, yeah, I talk more about all that sort of stuff in this chapter. I talk about what to do when you really struggle to just let go and blindly trust. Literally, here's how to actually make that come true, because the letting go and the blind trust and the faith part can, for some people, not really resonate, particularly if you're highly logical or rational, like I used to be. I used to be like captain fucking cynical and captain atheist and captain like logical, rational, you know, autistic person, and so here's how to deal with that. Like here's what to do about that. Like literally go hunting for evidence of other people who've succeeded, go researching, you know, like if you can find one person who's done this thing, then maybe you can do it too, and then I even talk about but what if I can't find anyone who's done this thing. It's like, well, motherfuckers, at some point no one had gone to the fucking moon and we did that. So can you not just be the first person to do this thing? You know, like, even if you can't find evidence of anyone else who's ever succeeded at this goal that you have which, by the way, most of you, your goals, are not, that, I wouldn't say, difficult I get a lot of people that come to me and they're like you know, do you think that I can ever make it? And I'm like what's your goal? And they're like you know, I just I want to get a girlfriend. I'm like, yes, motherfucker, people have been getting girlfriends since the dawn of time. I don't know if you knew that or not, but like, yes, you, you, absolutely, my beautiful man, you can get a girlfriend. Like it's not like you're saying do you think that I can like go to Mars and like, start a colony there? Yes, of course you can, but like there will be a lot of research and things you will need to do. You basically will need to do Elon Musk type things. So, yes, it's possible, but a lot of work. But most of your goals, most of our goals, are like I want a girlfriend or I want to lose some weight. It's like, yes, that's very fucking possible. So I talk about you know the logical side of the things. I talk about what to do with fear of the unknown. Really, you just make it a fear of the known. In other words, you research it, you ask what other people, or research what other people have done when they had this same fear that you have. You start taking some tiny little baby steps towards it. This is called exposure therapy. So I got a whole bunch of stuff on fears and what to do and, yeah, like some logical questions. You can ask yourself, like, what's the worst case scenario if my fear does come true? And then you sort of just go through it, you write it out or you flesh it out in your mind what would I do? What would I do, like, even if the thing I'm scared of is dying? Okay, let me flesh that out and explore that. So I talk about that. I talk about being like logical. Rather than just focusing on the fears, let's also focus on the potential wins. A lot of the time when someone has a big fear, they will focus on all the positive sorry, all the possible negative things that might happen. You know, I'm so scared of rejection, and what if she yells at me? And what if she doesn't like me? And what if I feel embarrassed? And what if everybody you know looks at me and notices and it's like, yeah, that might happen. I'm telling you now it probably won't, but it might happen. Let's be rational and balanced, though. What about the potential positive? What if you walk up to a woman and you hit on her and she goes oh my God, thank you so much. That's so nice of you, oh my God. And you're like whoa, okay, this is going well. What's your name? And she's like oh my God, my name is Sarah. Like what's your name? And you guys talk for like five minutes and you have the most amazing conversation. You're like, oh fuck, like do you want to grab a drink sometime with me? And she's like, oh my God, I thought you'd never ask. I'd love that. And then you guys go on a date and you have amazing sex and you end up dating and you get married and you have fucking kids. Like that might happen. And so anytime someone is focusing on the fears and the possible negative things that might happen, I get them to also tell me or tell themselves, really tell yourself some positive things that might happen, to kind of balance things out a little bit. We often tend to focus on the worst case scenario or the negative. We get ourselves all upset and we can spiral into like anxiety or fears and that sort of terror that we can terrorize ourselves with. It's like let's balance this out and focus on some potential positives. So I talk about how to do that. Again, this is a really long chapter. Yeah, I talk about there's no such thing as failure or mistakes. They're all learning lessons. Like every time I've looked back and thought something was a mistake or a failure, it's like years later or months later, it's like that was the best thing that could have happened to me because, like, holy shit, I learned something and I even right here, even if, like, all I learned was okay, don't do that again. Like sometimes that's the learning lesson. You have a really painful, beautiful learning lesson of like holy shit, all right, I'm not going to do that again. Like that's beautiful. So how could that ever be a mistake? That's a learning lesson. Like there are no fucking mistakes, there are no failures. You learn something. Next chapter is on failures, setbacks and stress, like how to become resilient, and I believe the first thing I say is there isn't even any fucking failures like. But yeah, I talk about like here, this, this chapter, I think, is more like a reassurance. I'm like, look, everything is okay, everything is going to be okay. I promise, no matter what you're struggling with, it's going to work out. Just like, keep going, just repeat yourself Everything will be okay. I promise it will be. Yeah, this whole chapter is just like a gentle hug for those times when you're feeling sad or stressed or you've just had a big setback or you're worried. You're not going to make it like. This entire chapter is me just giving you a big hug. And in the video course version I have even more stuff, as in a couple of videos, a couple of guided meditations and stuff like that to sort of give you that big hug and to tell you look, everything's okay. I promise like I talk about what to do when you're feeling like you just can't do anything today. Like, just pick one tiny little thing that you can do. And I also talk about having days off as well. I talk about that in the later chapter as well. I have a whole chapter about taking days off and, especially when you're stressed, and just giving yourself a little bit of a break and being kind to yourself and loving yourself, and you know you don't always have to push yourself and go crazy. So I talk about all of that in here. I talk about accountability partners and having other people look after you and be there for you when you have some sort of setback or stress or you feel like you failed or you feel like you're not going to make it Like I wouldn't have done everything I've done without accountability and friends and support and stuff like that. Obviously, the best version that I can give you right now of accountability is our coaching program. Like a big part of the coaching is accountability. You also get, like I said here, lifetime access to our accountability group. We have a members only accountability group that you get to stay in for life and all of the coaches are in there. I sometimes jump in there and help people. Everyone helps themselves in there. So that's like, hands down, the best version of accountability that I could ever give you. But on top of that, I talk about some other ways of finding accountability partners. I have an entire chapter on it of like how to find accountability partners and have other people support you. I talk about taking time off. I take at least one day off every single week and I have for the last like eight years. I talk about what to do on that and you know what to do if you have the worry of like I can't afford to take a day off, like I talk about hey, it's okay. Like this is the most productive thing that you could do, taking time off, recharge your batteries. You remember that this whole journey is allowed to be fun. It doesn't have to be this big stressful thing of achievement and productivity and kicking ass and you're allowed to have fun with it. What to do when you're overwhelmed, you know, take some extra time off. Nothing bad will happen if you take a little bit of time off. I think it's a big stress that guys and girls have. I have some actual exercises and again in the video course version of this, I walk you through this exercise. So if you grab the course again it's literally $1, please grab the course. You don't have to grab the course if you don't want to, but like it's fucking $1. If you're interested in this, if you watch this far, just grab the course. But in the video course I have, like I guide you through this and I put visuals on the screen, I put music it's. I put a lot of effort into it. I think it's it's. It's one of my favorite exercises is this zooming out exercise to remind yourself that everything's okay and everything's going to be okay. I have a second exercise as well that I talk about, and this entire book has a lot of exercises in how to sort of give yourself a little bit more perspective when you feel like you failed or you feel like you're stressed or you feel like you're not going to make it. There's another book here called Instant Calm, which I love as well. This has like 100 techniques or something of literally how to calm yourself down or how to feel better, how to feel happy. So this is such a beautiful book. And then, yeah, again in the video course version. I like this chapter in the video course. This was my favorite chapter from the video course I think I talk about and I show on the screen, like building a building and how at the start it can feel like you're not really making much progress towards your goals, just like when you're building a building. When you're constructing a building. At the start you're laying the foundation, you're just putting the concrete on the ground. It doesn't really feel like you're building a building. You're like there's just fucking concrete on the ground, like I haven't done anything, and it can be like that for months. If you're talking about a big apartment building or like a high rise building, it can be like that for a year. There's just like fucking nothing there. There's just like they dug some holes in the ground, then they filled them back in, then they put some concrete, then they haven't built a building yet. And it can be like that for a year. Then all of a sudden, boom. First floor, second floor, third floor. It just starts like exponentially increasing. And it can feel like that with our goals, because at the start we might be in the foundations or in the stage of laying the foundation and it feels like man, I'm making no progress. Like when you first start going to the gym. You don't really make any progress. You don't like gain muscle or anything. Like you don't even know how to bench press the first few weeks or months. Are you figuring out how to even do the exercises or what exercises to even do. You don't make any progress. Really. It is progress. It just doesn't look like progress and then all of a sudden, it starts to slowly pay off. So, yeah, I talk about having some perspective and just hanging in there and how to do that, how to be more patient, how to reflect and be grateful for that progress, like how to actually look for that progress. And even if that doesn't work and you're feeling frustrated or you're feeling sad, hey, that's a beautiful thing. Like, if you're frustrated by your lack of progress, isn't that a beautiful thing? That's going to propel you and be fuel for the fire. You're going to try 10 times harder because you're pissed off that you're not making progress. So it's all beautiful, it's all a gift. This next chapter, oh my God, yeah, fuck, yeah. This chapter, Everything is a story and you're in control of the stories you tell. This can be quite an advanced concept for people. So don't stress if this doesn't resonate with you, like at first. But this chapter, I almost don't want to spoil this chapter. I almost want to leave it. Fuck, let's leave this chapter. Let's leave this chapter. I think this is like. This is like my favorite little chapter. You can grab the video course, you can have this chapter, you can read this chapter and watch this chapter. I really fucking like that chapter. If you embrace that mindset that everything is a story and you're in control of the story, jesus Christ, that's life changing. I'm legitimately getting fucking goosebumps thinking about that. The map of consciousness. I released this as a free video on YouTube already, so you can probably just go and watch that. It's the previous video on my channel. But, yeah, this one, yeah, I like this chapter too. Self reflection, mindfulness and gratitude yeah, same sort of thing in this one. I talk about, like how to celebrate your wins, how to have, like you know, accountability partners, how to look back and be grateful for the journey, how to not move the goalpost, which is where you achieve a goal, and then you're like, shit, I'm still not happy, I'm going to achieve another goal, and then you just like keep doing that and you're never actually enjoying the process, you're never happy, and you see that a lot with high, like very successful people and high achievers where they're often just like not happy or they burn out or they feel overwhelmed, or they get to a point where they're like what was the point of making all of this money? So this entire chapter is basically how to enjoy the journey and not have that feeling of like I'm a rat in a ham or I'm a rat in a maze or a hamster in a hamster wheel, just like constantly spinning my wheels and never being happy. So that's a big part of what I think I talked about here. Yeah, in my coaching program. That's a big part of what we do in the coaching program. Well, like, how can we ensure that you, or how can we show you that you're allowed to have fun on this journey? It doesn't just have to be grind, grind, grind. You can grind as well, but enjoy that process. Don't suffer while you grind. You achieve 10,000 times more as well when you actually enjoy the damn journey instead of feeling like it's just like miserable things. So talk about gratitude, too, as well. Gratitude to you, all of you. I talk about that a lot, and then the final chapter is like gratitude. In the video course. I have more shit than what's on screen, but basically I list out all the things I'm grateful for. Yeah, talk about the music that I used. I used music in the video course as well, and the music came from one of my favorite Super Nintendo games. That was fun, yeah. So this is something else that I'm going to start doing. I've opened up like donations. So if any of you want to donate, by the way, you can donate at that link on the screen. I'll also it's in the description, like in the YouTube description as well. I've got a Bitcoin wallet there as well, if you want to. So I like this, this mindset, more. I like this model more, where it's like I'm going to give away all of my courses for pay, whatever you want. You know, pay $50, pay $1, pay $1, like whatever you want, but if you only have $1, pay $1, like. Don't feel guilty, please. I want you to have this content. Please pay $1, like. Because that might be another concern that you might have or people might have, which is like well, I can't pay $1. That's not fair. It's like, please, just pay $1. Like, if that's all you have, pay $1. If you're like in a third world country or you're really struggling, I've had a few people email me, actually, and say, dude, I'm really struggling, I really want the video course, and I'm like, dude, just pay $1. Then, like, pay $1, fucking dollar, you can pay $1. If you're struggling, please, just I'm okay with $1. Like, I'm grateful for $1, but this is part of what I'm doing. As part of that is, you know, if you can't afford. I've had lots of emails over the last like couple of years where people are like dude, I really wish I could afford the coaching but I just can't. I really want to be part of the coaching but I just can't. And in the past I had a very combative mindset. This is, like you know, a year or two ago where I was like I had it in my head that like if someone can't afford the coaching, even with a payment plan, if they can't afford that, they're not serious about their life, blah, blah, blah. And I would. I would tell these stories that didn't really serve me and they weren't kind. They also weren't true. Like some people literally just can't afford to pay $500 a month for a payment plan, like, literally, that's the reality. For a long time I couldn't afford that and I had this very like I don't know you could call it entitled, but it was coming from a place of insecurity and stress and like money stress and believing my own stories that I needed money and all of that kind of stuff, and so that was where I used to be at. But these days. No like if you literally, by the way, if you don't have any money to donate, please don't donate money, like I don't need your money. But you know, embracing this idea of if someone can just only donate $1, like if they want to donate a dollar and that's all they have, that's fucking beautiful. So I'm moving towards this more like donation style way of doing things. My coaching is still going to cost what it costs. So right now, as of the time of recording, it's 11 grand for the hardcore coaching program and this payment plans and stuff like that as well. That's always going to stay at whatever it is priced at, just because then it's like a nice entry requirement. It means that everyone in the program is like really hardcore, ultra, mega serious, and we're not just letting anybody into the coaching program, but all of my video courses and stuff like that I'm just going to release as like a pay, whatever you can model in the early days of doing all of this content. You know, especially like my Tinder guide, which is like 130,000 words, which is like orders of magnitude bigger than this video course, and this video course just took me like three months to do, but the original Tinder guide, which is still up on my website. Really, it's a self improvement guide more than a Tinder guide, but that guide, you know, I had so many people in the early days say, like dude, you should charge money for this. This is worth like thousands of dollars. And I, just thanks to good look, chris from good looking loser and a few other people Pat Flynn from smart passive income you know a few people like that who said that they had had so many benefits from, and felt so good about releasing content for free I always knew that I was going to make the Tinder guide free and as I've started doing some of these video courses, this is my second video course and again, cam also wrote an ebook. You know this ebook here how to get laid in six weeks if you're a virgin or inexperienced. As we've started doing more of these video courses and books and I've been trying to figure out like, how much do I price them out? What do I charge? Like, do I go big? Like? Because this video course is literally every mindset trick that I've, every, everything that I've learned over the last like 10 or 15 years of self improvement. This is like my life's work. This is essentially for me. It feels like my magnum opus and I'm sure I'm going to do more content in the future, obviously, but at this point in time, this is my magnum opus. This is the thing that I feel most passionate about, 10 times more than the Tinder guide, and the Tinder guide at the time was like my magnum opus. This is, I think, more impactful than the Tinder guide by orders of magnitude. If you get some of the concepts that are in this video course and book, your entire life is going to change. Like like I'm not understating I don't think I can understate how impactful some of these ideas or all of these ideas have been for me. You know, releasing all these things, it doesn't feel right that I charge big amounts of money, you know, and I had some suggestions of people said like you could charge like $5,000 for this video course and yes, I could. This is like everything I've learned for the last 10 years. Like I could easily charge five grand for this and it would be a fucking steal Again, I think, if you took in some of these ideas and implemented them in your life, the entire course of the rest of your life. This is like life changing stuff. But these aren't my ideas. You know what I mean. Like. I didn't come up with these ideas. I didn't invent the idea of like give yourself permission to suck. It just popped into my head one day. I didn't come up with the idea of like everything that happens to me is good. It came from, you know, probably Seneca and Marcus Aurelius and the old Stoics. I didn't come up with the idea of like run towards your fears. It came from people like David Goggins and people like that. I didn't come up with any of these ideas. They're not my ideas. They're even the things that maybe I'm the first person to say which is probably going to be nothing. There's probably nothing, I'm the first person to say. But even if there was, I didn't choose to have that idea. That idea just popped into my head and so it didn't feel right, and it doesn't feel right to charge big amounts of money for stuff that isn't really mine. It's just ideas that I'm the conduit for. I'm just allowing them to then pass on to you. Other people were just the conduit as well. They passed it on to me. I'm passing it on to you. So I really like this idea of like you know, donating and just if you can only pay one dollar. Pay one fucking dollar also means that nobody gets excluded. I don't like the idea of like, especially this video course. Again, this is I'm really freaking passionate about this video course and I don't like the idea of these ideas not going to people who need them. I even said at the end when did I put it? I put it somewhere here. I don't know where it is. It's somewhere here, somewhere in here. I basically said, like, if you want, yeah, here you go. If you want to like, if you end up buying this video course, no matter what you pay for it, you're welcome to share these videos with other people as well. Like, you don't have to get them to repurchase it. I would love it if you did, or if you made a donation or something. That would be amazing, thank you. But, like, I'm okay even if you share these ideas, like for free. Like if you give these videos to other people. Obviously I won't make money, but I want these ideas to go out to other people, so it feels more right to be moving in this direction. So, yeah, I also talk about, you know, coaching at the end of this thing. You guys know all the coaching stuff. If you want to hit me up for coaching, absolutely go for it. Obviously, these things I'm still doing these as well the like $200 coaching course. So if you want to grab one of those, hell yeah, let's do one of those. You can just click on this link. The link is in the description of the YouTube as well. You can book it in it's $200. Sit down for an hour. There used to be 30 minutes, but I'll make them an hour now. They were all going for more than an hour anyway. So I was like, why am I calling them 30 minutes? They literally never end up being 30 minutes. So, yeah, I got some testimonials and shit like that, but I'm still doing these calls. But yeah, I think that's everything I wanted to show you on the video course. I also put some gratitude in here at the end. Yeah, I think that's everything. So if you guys want that, like I said, pay whatever you want to pay for it. If that's only a dollar, pay $1 for that. I will leave a link in the description below to this entire course and the book. All of my coaching clients, you guys all have it for free. Coaching clients get everything for free. But yeah, I hope this is helpful. If it's not, that's okay too, but I can't predict the future and I don't have expectations. But, that said, these ideas really are life changing and I'm very grateful for everybody who gave me these ideas David Hawkins, byron, katie, all of the Stoics, good Looking Loser, a million other people I can't list everybody but these ideas, this book, was basically every idea that's changed my life over the last 10 or 15 years, and some of these are not small things. I even say at the start of the book there is a hell of a lot here and if you are only able to take on a couple of the things, your entire course of your life is life changing. I even said this like, yeah, there's a lot here, and don't feel like you have to do everything that I've listed in this entire video course. You could literally just pick one or two of these chapters, and I would probably recommend that honestly. Just pick one or two chapters and start practicing that so you could practice. I mean pick any of these chapters, I mean pick any, but like you could literally practice, everything that happens to me is good. You could just go around saying can I find some sort of positive silver lining in this thing that has just happened to me. If you just practice that enough, over like six months or a year you will become the most hyper positive, over the top optimistic human being on the planet, like you'll literally become some Mother Teresa type, like Saint Motherfucker. You become like Jesus walking around, going like nothing that happens is bad, Everything is good, like that's saintly. That's like the path to enlightenment. This I mean this video course is essentially sort of a path to enlightenment. There's even a chapter on that like the map of consciousness. That's what the map is. If you have a look on the left in that rainbow diagram, it is literally a path to enlightenment. Down the bottom you have shame, guilt, apathy, fear, and then right at the top you have like enlightenment and peace. So this video course was essentially me attempting to not attempting, but getting across everything that's helped me be more peaceful. I don't want to say enlightened, because that word doesn't always resonate with me personally, but more peaceful, more happy, more present, more in the moment, just more loving and at peace. So yeah, I hope this video course brings you lots of happiness, lots of smiles, lots of positivity. If you have any questions about it, feel free to you know you can always just leave a comment or email me or whatever. Again, pay whatever you want for it. Link is in the description below. As always, ladies and gentlemen, go out there, crush those goals, have a beautiful time. And, yeah, I'm grateful for all of you. Maybe I didn't make that clear enough, but a big part of this video course, a big part of, like the chapters that I put in here, there's an entire chapter on my gratitude for all of you. You know you've all allowed me to get to this point every single day when I wake up. Literally you guys and girls are responsible for the fact that I get to wake up, and sometimes it feels like do nothing but just be peaceful and happy and enjoy my life. Like, literally, I get to just wake up some days and walk every day. These days, I get to walk around and just be happy all day, and that doesn't end Like. There might be moments where I believe a story of like, oh, I'm stressed, I need more money, but there's just this overwhelming sense of happiness and peace that never really leaves me anymore. It stays for months at a time, like I'm just permanently fucking happy because of all of you, Because you pay my bills. You got me to this position. You let me sit here and or you allow me to sit here and just read spirituality books, and read happiness books and work on myself and improve myself and have an amazing sex life and coach all of you and do this content. You literally let me sit here and just fucking do content and that's how I pay my bills. I get to literally just talk into this camera and this microphone. You can't even imagine how unbelievably grateful and happy I am for all of you. So I put all of this in the video course again. But I'll say it to all of you here I'm so unbelievably thankful. I'm so unbelievably grateful. I can't believe that my life is this charmed. I live a charmed life. I get to just walk around being fucking happy all the time and smiling at 100 human beings a day, and then I get to see some of them be happy. Then I get to coach people and see them be happy. Then I get to do content and have some of you be happy. Then I get to see her and do this video course, which I'm sure is going to make even more people happy. Like this is just such a beautiful gift that all of you have given me so fucking. Thank you.

Video Course
Finding Positivity and Taking Action
Achieving Goals
Overcoming Challenges and Finding Support
Storytelling and Enjoying the Journey
Transition to a Donation-Based Model
Video Course on Enlightenment and Gratitude